Your Guardian Angel
by xxH0ttiixx
Summary: When the unthinkable happens Reba is forced to live with the consequences of her actions. R & R plz!
1. the perfect affair

"Shhh!" Reba said giggling. She put a finger over Brock's mouth, "You're going to wake up the kids!" He smiled at her and then leaned forward and hugged her. He tripped and fell back onto the couch, so he pulled Reba down with him. He caught her by surprise and she make a little screaming noise that sounded more like a squeak due to the fact that Brock kissed her. "Brock!" she whispered.

She teasingly smacked his chest. "Sorry I couldn't resist." He said pushing away a piece of hair from her face. Reba looked into his eyes and was suddenly hit with guilt. What they were doing was wrong and she knew it.

"Brock…," she sat up, "We can't keep doing this. What about Barbra Jean? And the kids not knowing, it's not right. What if they find out?"

"Honey, don't worry about it. It's just you and me, no one needs to know. And how would anyone find out? You're not telling and I'm not telling. Full-proof plan."

"What if Cheyenne or any of our kids walk downstairs right now? Or even your wife! We both know she likes to sneak into my bedroom window at night. What do we do then?" she said getting frustrated.

"You worry too much. Common, relax. If someone was coming we could hear them," he reassured her. He took her hand and kissed it. He pulled her so that she scooted down the couch and sat on his lap. She was so skinny Brock hardly noticed the difference.

"You're right. I worry too much." She agreed. She looked up and saw him smiling at her. "What?"

"Nothing," he told her. She gave him an annoyed gaze, she hated not knowing what was going on. "You're just so beautiful." Reba hit his chest again and laughed. He kissed her and then he fell back onto the couch. Reba leaned down and kissed him. Once they were sure the kids were asleep they were together again in a way that no one would have ever imagined. After what happened between them 6 years ago, no one would suspect them…it was the perfect _affair_.

* * *

_'Cus I'm acting as if this blue sky's never gonna rain down on me,_

_I'm telling myself this true love's never gonna leave me lonely,_

_Unless there's someting I've missed,_

_I'm acting as if._

_As if your sweet kiss is never gonna fade away,_

_And the way you look at me will never change._


	2. your guardian angel

Brock stopped by Reba's for his morning visit. Once the kids left for school and BJ took Henry to daycare, they were alone, which started everyone's morning off on a good note. "I better get going," Brock said in-between kisses.

"So soon?" Reba pouted. She wrapped her arms around his neck, as if she was preventing him from leaving.

"I know, but I go to go or I'm going to be late," he informed her. "Here, I'll tell you what, I'll take an early lunch. Meet me at my office around 10:00 and we'll go out. Ok?" he wanted to stay just as much as Reba wanted him to.

"Mhmm," she nodded. Brock grabbed his coat and headed for the door. "Bye."

"Love you," he told her.

Reba smiled. That was the first time since their divorce that he had told her that he loved her. "Love you too!" she made sure to get in before he closed the door.

She spent the rest of the day cleaning up the house. Once 9:00 rolled around, which seemed like forever, she decided that she was going to take a shower and get ready, and looking good, for her visit to Brock's office. She pulled her hair into a half pony tail and did her make-up to perfection. Once that was done she pulled on a pair of jeans and a black off-the-shoulder top with her favorite boots. Before she walked out of her room she did a quick double-check in the mirror and then grabbed her keys and left. She could feel the excitement in her stomach once she pulled into the parking lot of Brock's office building. She got out of the car and walked up past a boy with a skateboard that was standing by the door. He opened it for her and then followed behind her all the way to Brock's office. She stepped in and so did the boy. "Hi!" she said greeting Brock with a hug, "I missed you!"

Brock looked down and smiled at her, "I missed you too. You look marvelous!" he took her hand and spun her around to see her full outfit.

"Thank you," she said and gave him a kiss, "Now where are we eating? I'm starving."

"Me too!" he agreed. Just then Reba felt herself being pulled away from Brock. She turned around to see that boy that had walked in behind her.

"Everybody! Hands up!" the boy shouted. Reba was annoyed; who did this kid think he was?

"Get your hands off me!" Reba yelled while trying to pull away from his grasp on her arm. He threw Reba to the ground and the boy pulled out a gun and pointed it in her direction.

"NO!" Brock ran over to the boy to try and stop him from what everyone in the small office knew the boy was about to do. Then the aim of the gun turned over to Brock's direction and everyone heard a loud _bang_ noise. The teenage boy then ran, afraid of what he had done.

Reba's eye's widened and she screamed, "NO!" and she crawled over to Brock who had fallen to the floor. "Baby, shh, it's ok," she comforted him as she laid his head in her lap and took his hand in her own. There were tears pouring down her face as everyone watched her. "Somebody call an ambulance!" she yelled and the man nearest to the phone called for help, but everyone knew that it wouldn't make a difference.

"I love you," Brock whispered.

Reba gave a tear-filled smile, "I love you too." She leaned down and kissed him. "It's gonna be ok, don't worry, we called an ambulance. Just hold on ok?" Brock nodded, slower with each nod, and began to close his eyes, "No!" she whispered. She couldn't make a noise over a whisper at this point. She knew she was loosing him, "Brock! No! You can't go! I love you! Please!!" she put her hand on his cheek and cried. He was gone.

The ambulance got there faster then Reba had expected. After trying to revive him they told Reba they were sorry, but there was nothing they could do. "NO!" she yelled, "No. No. No! Please! Brock! No! Brock!! NO!" she couldn't stop the tears from falling down her face.

"I'm sorry," they apologized for her loss.

* * *

_I will never let you fall,_

_I'll stand up with you forever,_

_I'll be there for you through it all,_

_even if saving you sends me to heaven._

_'Cause you're my,_

_you're __my true love,_

_my whole heart, _

_please don't throw that away._

_Because I am here, for you._

_Please don't walk away, _

_and please tell me you'll stay._


	3. i miss you

It was one month to the day of Brock's unanticipated death and all of the Hart family, including BJ, was over for dinner. Things were starting to go back to normal, but no one ever forgot Brock. He was always on everyone's mind, but no one really spoke of him. Their dinner discussion consisted of work, school, and TV.

"Dinner's done!" Reba yelled into the living room. Everyone came running into the living room. "Cheyenne, can you clean up after dinner? I'm going to take a nap, I have a horrible headache."

"Yeah, no problem. You don't look so good."

"I don't feel too hot," she told her. She suddenly felt like she might throw-up. She walked upstairs and flopped down on the bed. After laying there she got up and went to the bathroom because she suddenly was not feeling good at all. She spent the rest of the night sleeping on the bathroom floor, just incase. When she woke up in the morning she told Cheyenne to watch Jake, and she left for the doctor's office.

"Well there is good news and bad news," he told her. "The bad news is that there is no medication for what you have," he gave her a little smile, "but the good thing is that you're pregnant Mrs. Hart." Reba's eyes grew large.

"What!?" She asked a little worried. That wouldn't be right. That _couldn't_ be right because that would mean the baby was…Brock's. She couldn't deal with that right now.

"Yes, it looks like you are about a month pregnant."

"A-alright…I-I go. I have to, to go." She said grabbing her purse from the seat beside her. She couldn't believe this. This baby had the worst timing _ever_. Not only was she pregnant but Brock wasn't here with her. He wouldn't be around when she needed him the most.

She got home and went straight to bed. She walked right past everyone in the living room on her way up, saying nothing. She finally cried herself to sleep…

_Reba was sitting on the porch swing in front of her house. "But what do I do?" she asked him._

"_Don't worry. I'll be there. I'll be in your heart all the time." He told her._

"_I miss you so much Brock! I don't know if I can do this without you," she started to cry._

"_Oh, honey, don't cry. This is a good thing. It's a way to have you with me when you need me the most. I won't be far, just here," he said putting his hand on her stomach._

_Reba put her hand on his, "I'm scared Brock."_

"_I know, and if I could be with you I would be. I'm stuck here, but if you need me, don't worry, I'll be with you all the time. I'll see you, here. When you dream it will always be you and me. Forever and always," He smiled. _

Then her alarm clock woke her up. _Did I sleep through the whole day?_ She wondered to herself. She walked downstairs and saw Cheyenne making breakfast for everyone. "Mom! You're awake! You scared us there for a minute."

"Yeah, did I sleep through the day?!" she asked, a little shocked at the thought. She normally would never sleep so long.

"Yes you did, but we figured that we would let you sleep because you didn't look good to begin with," Cheyenne told her mother.

"Well, thank you. What are you making?" she curiously asked because what she was looking at in the pan was something she didn't recognize.

"Eggs," Cheyenne smiled to her mom, proud of her work.

"Umm, you do know that all you have to do is crack the egg in the pan, right?"

"Yeah, I know. That's what I did."

"Then why is it brown?" She questioned.

"Umm, I don't know, I wasn't paying attention," She shrugged.

"Here let me help you with that," Reba grabbed the pan from her daughter, who was perfectly willing to give it up. Reba suddenly smelt something that didn't agree with her and ran for the bathroom.

"What was that?" Cheyenne asked Van.

"I don't know," he replied, a face full of toast. The way he said it made Cheyenne remember when she used to watch Scooby-Doo every Saturday morning with her dad. She missed him so much.

Reba came back into the kitchen and everyone's head turned in her direction. "Mom, are you ok?"

"Uh huh, yeah, I'm fine," She lied.

"You've been acting really weird lately. What's up with you?" she asked out of concern.

"Nothing," she was nervous, talking fast.

"The way you're acting it's almost like you're…," she gasped, "Oh, no. Tell me you're not!" Reba tried to give her a confused look. "You're even bad at hiding it!" Nobody else, besides Reba, seemed to catch onto what Cheyenne was saying. "Mom's pregnant!"

"Cheyenne!" Reba yelled.

"Well, is it true?" Reba didn't say anything; she just looked at the floor. She wished Brock was here. He would know what to say. Reba never knew what to say in situations like this. She hated the way everyone was looking at her. She was just glad BJ wasn't here. "It's true!" Cheyenne knew through Reba's silence that she had guessed right. "Whose is it?" she continued to press the issue that Reba wanted so desperately to avoid. She was being watched by every in the room. Kyra stopped eating her cereal and looked at her mom in shock, and Van walked next to Cheyenne and gave Reba a concerned look. Jake was in the other room watching cartoons, one less stare she had to take.

"Cheyenne," Reba tried to get her to drop it. Cheyenne wasn't buying it and gave her mother an annoyed look, "Yes, I'm pregnant ok!"

"MOM!" Kyra yelled! Cheyenne smiled, she knew she was right.

"I'm sorry, please, Kyra, don't be mad," she begged.

"I'm not mad…just shocked. I _never_ would have expected this one…wow, we really are a circus family!" she laughed. Reba knew it too; their family was anything but normal. Kyra grabbed her backpack and left for the bus.

"So, whose is it mom?" Cheyenne asked again.

Reba hated to say this. She knew it would cause nothing but hurt for everyone, "Brock's," she let out. Cheyenne's mouth fell open. _What!?_ She thought.

"Oh, my God! Are you serious? You had an affair with your ex husband? What are you going to tell BJ?" She was just amazed now. When she really thought about it she realized that this was going to cause nothing but problems.

Reba was irritated by her first two questions so she decided only to answer the last one, "I don't know what I'm going to tell Barbra Jean and I hate to do this alone. I know that I have to tell her, and soon before she finds out on her own, I just don't know how." Just then, Barbra Jean came over to say 'hi'. "Oh God…," Reba muttered to herself.

"Going to tell her now?" Cheyenne asked at a whisper.

Reba waved her away from her, hoping that Barbra Jean had no idea they were talking about her. "Tell me what?" Barbra Jean asked.

"Mom's pregnant!" Cheyenne blurted out. She immediately put her hands over her mouth and gasped. She knew she wasn't supposed to say anything, it just slipped out. Reba looked over at her daughter in shock. She slapped her arm and glared at her.

"You're what!?" BJ couldn't believe that.

"Pregnant," Reba mumbled, quickly followed by, "Eggs?" She held out the pan towards BJ, trying to get this conversation over with any way she could.

"Whoa!" Barbra Jean stood up and pushed back the pan. "Who's is it?!" she was starting at her wide-eyed, with a completely shocked expression. This was not something that she would have _ever_ expected from someone like Reba. Reba was always the careful and responsible one.

This is the part that Reba wanted to go away. She didn't want to be the one to tell BJ she had an affair with her husband. She didn't want to be the other woman to the other woman; not without Brock here. It was then that she remembered what Brock told her in her dream: that this baby was his way of being with her when she needed him. She sat down on the chair next to her and wrapped her arms around her stomach. With Brock with her she knew she could do it, "Brock."

Barbra Jean looked at Reba with an expression like _very funny_. She looked into Reba's eyes and stared at the expression across her face and it was then she knew; this wasn't a joke. Barbra Jean didn't look as hurt as she thought she would. "Well, I guess that's why," she said to herself.

"Why what?" Cheyenne asked.

"Brock and I were getting a divorce. I guess it was because he wanted to be with you. It makes sense…," she continued the rest in thought.

"I'm sorry Barbra Jean," she really didn't want to loose Barbra Jean as a friend.

"No, Reba, I knew that he loved you. I mean, he always looks at you like you are an angel. It was just a thought I tried to keep out of my head. But you are my best friend, and I want you to be happy. And if Brock was what made you happy, and you are excited about this baby, then I'm happy for you," she smiled and walked over to give her a hug. Reba hugged her and held tight. She felt herself start to cry, and Barbra Jean stood there for a long time comforting Reba in her time of need.

"I miss him so much," Reba cried out into her friend's shoulder. Once she started she felt like she couldn't stop—she needed to let it out.

"We all do," BJ told her. "Why don't you go upstairs and lay down while I finish up the dishes, ok?"

"Oh, you don't have to do that-," she was cut off.

"No, I want to. Now go."

"Thank you Barbra Jean."

Reba walked to her room and spent hours crying into her pillow. She finally sat up and hugged her stomach as tight as she could, almost as if she were holding herself together, that if she didn't she would fall apart. It was comforting to know that in her mind she knew that Brock was with her…

* * *

_Where are you?_

_And I'm so sorry,_

_I cannot sleep, _

_I cannot dream tonight._

_I need somebody and always._

_This sick strange darkness comes creeping in haunting every time._

_Can you come home and stop this pain tonight?_

_Stop this pain tonight._

_I miss you._


	4. take me there

_Reba walked through a light and she saw someone's shadow in the distance. "Hello?" Reba said, her voice echoing. The shadow turned, but she still couldn't see its face._

_"Reba?" She stopped dead in her tracks, the voice was someone familiar— it was Brock. "Oh my God!" Reba said walking a little faster. Brock's arms were opened wide and Reba leaped into them and hugged him. _

_"God, I've missed you." Reba said kissing him. _

_"I've been watching over you, you know, and I can tell you're nervous," Brock said. _

_"Yeah, but it's just, I don't know if I can make it on my own," Reba confessed to him. _

_"I'll be there, don't worry," Brock comforted her._

_"I-I know." Reba said hugging him. It was then she started getting that feeling that she dreaded in all of her dreams; the feeling that Brock was moving farther into the distance, and farther away from her. _

Reba heard her alarm clock ring and she shot up. She knew it was a dream, but she still hated having to wake up and let go of Brock again. "Ugh!" Reba moaned before rushing to the bathroom and throwing up.

* * *

_I wanna know everything about you then_

_And I wanna go down every road you've been_

_Where your hopes and dreams and wishes live_

_Where you keep the rest of your life hid_

_I wanna know the girl behind that pretty stare_

_Take me there_

* * *

This chapter was **not** possible without Ashton (Ensign Nellie Forbush)!! Thankx a million!!!


	5. who knew?

About 7 months had pasted and the family had grown used to the idea of having a new baby around. Everyone was excited, even Barbra Jean. She was around a lot helping out around the house and with the kids whenever Reba wasn't up to it. Reba dosed off after doing so necessary cleaning in her room…

"_I hate that you can't be with us," she told him, like she did every time she got the chance to talk to him. Only in her dreams._

"_I hate that I can't be with you," he stated. He put a strand of hair behind her ear and kissed her cheek. _

Reba woke up to a slight pain in her side, but it wasn't that noticeable and she blew it off like it was nothing, but a few minutes later she felt the pain come back again. _No!_ she thought. She knew what it was, but she wasn't ready to let go of the comfort of knowing that Brock was with her. This baby was Brock's way of being there for her when things got tough, and that was something that she wasn't prepared to give up.

_Ok_, Reba thought, _I'll be fine. These things take a while. If I go downstairs now nobody will suspect anything_. Reba got up and walked downstairs. She was relieved to know that Barbra Jean was in the kitchen making everyone something to eat. "Hey there, Barbra Jean!" Reba smiled.

"Good afternoon sleepy head!" Barbra Jean offered her a plate of something that smelled good to Reba. It was then that she noticed how hungry she was, so she answered the gesture with a, "Mhmm!" and then reached for the plate and that pain from her side, which had now moved to her stomach, came back again.

"You know what? I'm not that hungry after all. I'll eat something later. I'm going to go shower. Thank you though," she told everyone. "Oh, and leave the dishes," she told Barbra Jean, "I'll get them when I'm done."

"That was strange...," Cheyenne thought out-loud.

"Yeah, I wonder what's up with Mrs. H.," Van added. They both shrugged it off, and continued eating. But Barbra Jean was a little suspicious of what was going on. She knew that Reba was acting funny, but she didn't know why, and she was going to find out.

Reba quickly got in and out of the shower, and then picked out something comfortable to wear around, she wasn't in the mood for really getting ready so she just put her hair into a ponytail and went to sit in bed and watch TV. Barbra Jean was standing outside the door listening to every move Reba made, trying to figure out what was going on. She took a step forward and was not peering into Reba's room from the small space Reba had left open in the door.

Reba started flipping through the channels when that annoying pain came back, but this time it seemed to hurt more then it had before, nothing she couldn't handle. She pulled her knees up as far as she could to her chest and took a deep breathe in, then out. _Huh, _Barbra Jean thought, _that's odd. _She stood there for a little while and waited until Reba was sitting there when the pain hit her again, "Ow," Reba cringed. Then Barbra Jean knew too: Reba was in labor!

Barbra Jean walked into Reba's room and saw Reba sitting up in bed with a tear rolling down her face. "Reba, common, I know what's going on. Why didn't you say anything!?" she asked, a little shocked that Reba would do something like this.

"I'm scared. I'm not ready to let go," she cried to Barbra Jean.

"Is this what you think Brock would want?" BJ questioned her. Reba thought about it for a second and let out a little laugh.

"Knowing Brock he would have carried me out against my will," they both chuckled because of how true it was.

"Now can we get you to the hospital?" BJ asked. Reba nodded and put out her arm so BJ could help her up.

"Thank you Barbra Jean," she stopped to thank a great friend. She didn't know what she would do without her. Sure, sometimes the woman could drive her insane, but in the end she had always been the best friend Reba had ever had and she was loyal to the end. No matter what happened, Barbra Jean would always be there for Reba and her family.

As they started for the door Reba had to stop and breathe her way through another contraction and once they finally made it to the hospital they learned that Reba had toughed most of this out at home. "Where is the baby's father?" the nurse asked for security purposes.

"Brock," Reba gave an edgy whisper to Barbra Jean, who was still at her side.

"He isn't,-he won't-he…passed away," Barbra Jean finally got out. She didn't want to say anything to upset Reba too much. Reba clung to BJ's arm as she couldn't help but think that she wished that it was Brock that was here with here.

Right after the baby was born Reba had fallen asleep, something she had wanted to do so badly since all of this had begun this afternoon…

_Reba walked into that bright room, and saw Brock sitting on their living room couch._

"_I'm so proud of you baby," he told her. She walked over and sat next to him. "Now that he's here your going to have to give him enough love for the both of us," he reminded her. Reba smiled and laughed._

_Brock wrapped his arm around her shoulders, "I assure you this baby will know you well," she promised him._

"_He's so beautiful. He has your eyes."_

"_I just wish you could be there to hold him yourself. It hurts to think that he is never going to know his father."_

"_Don't worry about that, you'll tell him all about me. He'll hear so much about me from the whole family that he will feel like he really did know me."_

"_And how do you know that?"_

"_I can see a few things," he informed her. _

"_What else can you see?" she said laying her head on his shoulder._

"_Hmm, let's see..." he thought for a minute, "Our little boy's name is going to be Ryan-" Reba cut him off._

"_Oh! I love that name!" she told him._

_Brock laughed quietly and then continued, "Kyra is going to graduate valedictorian from her high school, Jake is going to make the basketball team next year, and Cheyenne and Van are moving out soon," he finished._

"_Wow! That's a lot to take in! How…?"_

"_Just what happens, strange I know." Just then Reba felt that distant feeling again._

"_Brock! I don't want to leave yet!" she yelled for him but it was too late…_

"Mom," Cheyenne tried to wake her mother from the dead sleep she was in. "Mom!" she tried again, finally working. Reba groaned at whoever it was that was waking her, she was too exhausted to really care who it was, just that they were disturbing her perfect dream. "Mom, common, it's time to eat." Cheyenne told her mother. Reba waved away the food, which she remembered too well. She hated hospital food. She remembered how Brock used to sneak her in food from home or a restaurant of Reba's choice. "Ok," Cheyenne shrugged taking a bite of whatever was on the tray.

Reba sat herself up to look around. Cheyenne and Kyra were the only ones in the room and Cheyenne was now enjoying her food. "So did you think of any names yet?" Kyra asked.

Reba smiled and nodded, "Ryan."

Kyra smiled back at her mother, "I like it!"

"Me too." She moved over to make room for Kyra, and then she motioned for her to join her on the bed, and in font of whatever Kyra had previously been watching on the television. Kyra hopped up and leaned her head on her mom's shoulder. A nurse came to the door and asked Reba if she would like her to bring in the baby. Reba excitedly nodded and then she was told he would be in shortly.

After a few minutes they brought him in and put him into Reba's arms. The little, squirming, blanket covered child was so perfect it brought a tear to Reba's eye. She loved him so much. She was glad that he was here with her now. She felt silly for what she had pulled earlier. "Have you decided on a name?" the nurse asked.

Reba proudly looked up and told the nurse, "Ryan Hart."

_You took my hand._

_You showed me how._

_You promised me you'd be around._

_Uh huh, that's right._

_I took your words and I believe in everything you said to me._

_Yeah huh, that's right._

_If someone said 3 years from now you'd be long gone,_

_I'd stand up and punch them up,_

_Cause their all wrong._

_I know better,_

'_Cause you said forever,_

_and ever._

_Who knew?_

_Remember when we were such fools,_

_and so convinced, _

_and just too cool?_

_Oh, no, no, no._

_I wish I could touch you again,_

_I wish I could still call you a friend,_

_I'd give anything._

_When someone said 'count you blessings now,_

_for their long gone', _

_I guess I just didn't know how,_

_I was all wrong._

_They knew better,_

_Still you said forever,_

_And ever,_

_Who knew?_

_I'll keep you locked in my head,_

_Until we meet again._

_And I wont forget you my friend._

_What happened?_

_If someone said 3 years from now you'd be long gone,_

_I'd stand up and punch them up,_

_Cause their all wrong._

_That last kiss,_

_I'll cherish until we meet again,_

_And time makes it harder,_

_I wish I could remember,_

_But I'll keep your memory,_

_You'll visit me in my sleep._

_My darlin' _

_Who knew?_

_My darlin'_

_My darlin'_

_Who knew?_

_My darlin' _

_I miss you_

_My darlin'_

_Who knew?_

_Who knew?_


End file.
